I ended up in the prophesy room today, after all. It was a combination of creepy and boring. So, in most of the ways that count, it was just like reading the Bible . . . which far worse spelling and grammar. I copied down three of the very underwhelming "prophesies". Before the first prophesy, there was literally around forty minutes of people praising Jesus. It was very tedious. It went something like this:
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[19:34] <@hugsfromtheMASTER> lord god almighty
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[19:34] <@hugsfromtheMASTER> heaven and earth
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Imagine that for forty minutes, now. My guess is that they were trying to whip themselves up into enough of a frenzy not to feel stupid with their prophesies. I'm going to give you the ones I got. I'm not going to alter them at all. I decided that the disjointed nature, with the interruptions of various praises, is an integral part of the prophesy. After the prophesy, I'm going to make a few comments and then move on.
[19:36] <@hugsfromtheMASTER> Tiffany go please
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[19:41] <@hugsfromtheMASTER> yes lord
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[19:42] <@hugsfromtheMASTER> Amen!!! Thank you, Tiffany God bless you
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[19:42] <@hugsfromtheMASTER> anymore words 4 the room?
[19:42] <@hugsfromtheMASTER> o/tag
[19:42] <@hugsfromtheMASTER> for i ur god
As "prophesies" go, this one feels pretty contrived, without the least little bit of evocative imagery. I mean, really! Crosses scattered around and people go up to them pointing to ministry? What I do think is interesting is the persecution complex that seems built into religion. I think I just realized that a persecution complex is built into Christianity. What distinguishes Jesus is precisely his persecution. So here you've got these reasonably well-off (well-off enough to have computers and Internet connections, which most of the world simply can't afford) and their minds are filled with this apocalyptic imagery with themselves as the suffers in a hostile world . . . when they're amongst the most privileged group of people who have ever lived.
Unfortunately, it isn't close to being prophesy, even if it was a vision. Which I doubt it was, more like a prose poem. But, onwards!
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[19:54] <@hugsfromtheMASTER> Amen!!! Thank you, Tiffany God bless you
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[19:54] <@hugsfromtheMASTER> wonderful jesus
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Again, this isn't prophesy, really. It's not predicting or foretelling anything. But what struck me, here, is the symbols used. First, the symbols of wealth, pearls and jewels. We'll see them again, too. It is interesting for as poor a person as Jesus seemed to be, and that he was quite critical of material wealth, one of the most common Christians symbols are those of riches. Second, the symbol of the sword. After all that Christianity is supposed to be a religion of poverty and peace, there's a lot of talk about swords!
But, again, I find myself filled with disappointment. The imagery and message are tedious. I mean, the deep wisdom of this prophesy is that some people are called to do good deeds in the name of the Christian god? Not precisely a thrilling new message, there.
[19:54] <@hugsfromtheMASTER> shepherd go please
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[20:06] <@hugsfromtheMASTER> \o/
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This one is my favorite. What makes it my favorite? Allow me to summarize. This woman is next to Jehovah and she's hungry for him, to be saturated by him, and Jehovah, well, he has this throbbing pearl of power, and the woman really wants it, so Jehovah sticks it in her and she's filled with glory even twenty minutes after it was over. I see!
But, again, the actual message is . . . I mean, the message is that the Christian god doesn't care if you're not perfect, you've just got to accept Jesus, and then everything will be fine. The fairly intense sexual innuendo aside, the message is cut straight from the Bible and traditional Christian wisdom.
Indeed, all the messages were very normal, very traditional things that Christians say to each other. Biblical prophets, on the other hand, often are disbelieved and suffer because of their prophesy, because what they're saying are highly controversial things. This is quite the opposite of controversial. It's the lowest common denominator. What Christian is going to say that Jesus doesn't call people to ministry or that the Christian god is willing to forgive people who go to him?
I can also fairly confidentially call the guy who sent it to me full of shit, now, too. This is his miracle? I would say it's just a tawdry trick, but there isn't even a trick to it. It's just people writing Christian platitudes, and writing them poorly, at that. This is not a miracle. I could easily produce one of these prophesies -- and, indeed, produce a far superior one. I think I shall:I was standing at the foot of a path that lead up a great hill, and I felt the presence of the Lord behind me. I was with my brother, but I knew that he wanted to do me some wrong. Lightning struck a tree atop the hill, and a ball of flame descended upon me, but a sheet of rain fell and the fire went around me and I was not touched, for I did not fear because the Lord was with me. My brother was consumed by the flames, because he had not trusted in the Lord, and the Lord was not with him. And the Lord lead me up the hill, and on the other side was paradise. Those who trust in the Lord will be saved, those who are not will surely be cast into flames.
I think I'm ready for the big time!
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
A Bigger Dose of Prophesy
Posted by Unknown at 9:53 AM
Labels: christianity, fundamentalism, insanity, prophesy
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6 comments:
As I was reading that last part, I was thinking "wow, this is sexy!" The verbal masturbation of the religious!
Too bad it was boring :) Even getting "saturated" with "god's glory" wasn't enough to arouse my desire for religion.
Maybe if they had pics of it.....
I like yours the best, Chris! Now THAT was definately more stirring imagery.
Too bad that place was so dull :( Thanks for taking one for the team and bringing us the info. Now we all know what we're not missing! :)
This sounds like a free-writting exercise, huh?
From my experience in the Pentecostal denomination most prophesys are pretty much the benign...& like what's illustrated in this post.(alot of emotion but benign in content)
I always wondered what would happen if someone stood up & said something really earthshattering. But they never do.
In the Pentecostal church's I was familiar with, we had speaking in tongues & interpretation...most ministers are able by Church politics to restrict the weirdness to the sermon at hand. It's a slight of hand trick, really.
& Yeah, the persecution complex element is always there! (think of our conversation about Nietzsche & master and slave moralities?)
& the sex element? I've always thought of it as mutual masturbation, myself.
Chi,
Yeah, it was so disappointing! I was hoping for this really . . . I mean, I wanted more than I got. It was sorta like I'd imagined but not nearly as cool. I wanted real hellfire and damnation stuff. I wanted souls roasting over coals and people sizzling in oil! I wanted filthy dragons and whores! What I got was pretty lame, hehe. I could do a MUCH better job of it.
L>T,
Hehe, I'm sorta jealous of your experience with the Pentacostalists. Or, at least in the sense that it would be good for my writing if I'd seen that sort of thing up close and personal.
But, on reflection, it doesn't surprise me that "prophesy" is pretty shallow stuff. When a person says something controversial there's a controversy, hehe. Few religions would keep a controversial figure around. Religious folks, largely, want confirmation of what they believe, not refutation of their beliefs -- that's heresy or whatever. Still, it was disappointing!
And, yeah, Christians have got a full dose of the persecution complex. I'm in an email conversation today with a fella -- a middle-class white man -- who has brought up the "persecution" of Christians by us atheists. It has me rolling my eyes. I can sorta see where Nietzsche was coming from. He's, like, "Christians are the most powerful people in the world and believe the universe is persecuting them, despite their obvious power! That's fucked up! There's gotta be some deep reason for it!" I don't much agree where he went with it, but I can see how he got there. ;)
But . . . how strong is the sexual innuendo at the things you've seen? Is it commonplace?
L>T here,
when I was struggling with all this in the church as an adult. I didn't do any of the real crazy filled with the Holy spirit. I was pretty replused by it by then. I figured I could be a Christian w/out doing that, even a Pentecostal. There are different degrees of this insanity anyway.
My mother always went to crazy fall down(slain on the spirit)visions(hallucinations)casting out demons(this was big when the book the Excorcist came out)one step away from snake-handling churches.
The Assembly of God (big corporation) Church, hubby & I went to is geared for middle class Americans, the Holy Spirit filled concept is the same, but The Ass. of God tones it down.
I got the masterbation idea from how the holy spirit thing is built up in a service or any gathering where "He" is invited. the emotion(the creepiness you prob. felt) is palpable. I've seen unchurched people flee from it.
Anyway, the whole thing builds into a real orgasmic like experience for these people. that's the only way to describe it.
Prayer circles. The adult ones anyway are pretty sweaty affairs.
In real life Pentecostal experience there is a strong personality thing going on. I can tell you more if you want...
sorry it's "slain in the spirit" not on.
I've thought about this stuff alot being embroiled in it (or boiled in it) a large part of my life. It's very hard for children to navigate this particular snotgreen sea.
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